Fuck the latest round of beneficiary bashing in Australia

This is so fucked up on so many levels:

Young mums in Bankstown, Wyong and Shellharbour will be among the first in Australia forced to take part in a federal government trial of 10 disadvantaged areas that will strip them of their benefits if they don’t finish Year 12.

About 11,000 teenage parents receive a parenting payment worth up to $641 a fortnight and 90 per cent of them have not completed Year 12.

Under the government’s welfare crackdown, teenage parents will be required to attend six-monthly interviews with Centrelink once their baby is six months old and, on the child’s first birthday, will have to have a plan for completion of school.

 – Teen mothers told take your HSC, go to TAFE or lose your welfare payment

Meanwhile, the new National government over this side of the Tasman is also going to be fucking up the lives of people even more in the not too distant future. Worst hit are likely to be those on the DPB and Sickness Benefits. Grr.

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Things I learnt from last night’s TV1 election coverage – who is on the panel edition

1: Every channel needs a rape apologist. Rape apologists should be given prime election analysis spots, not shunned.

2: Women don’t have opinions, or if they do, they don’t matter. We should relegate them to puff pieces if they absolutely must appear.

3: Blokey blokes like to watch other blokey blokes and therefore the blokey bloke type blokes must talk to other blokey bloke type blokes about other blokey bloke type blokes doing blokey bloke things. Bloke.

Things I learnt from last night’s TV1 election coverage – John Key facts edition

1: That John Key starts his day with (Shock! Horror!) breakfast.

2: That despite being worth approximately $50 million, John Key eats really shitty pizza.

3: That, according to Mark Sainsbury, an empty car looks so similar to John Key that one can’t tell the difference when doing a live cross.

Open letter to the whiny dog down the road

Dear dog,

Hello. How are you? I know you don’t live in the neighbourhood, because I’ve never heard you around before. I hope you’re having a nice visit. I must respectfully request, however, that you please shut up. It’s almost 2am, and I have to be up for work in a few hours.

While I am normally opposed to unnecessary animal cruelty, if you do not cease and desist from your whining I may become tempted to make an exception to my rule. I do wonder what you are whining about, but no matter what, that doesn’t make your whining acceptable at this time of night in a residential area.

On the plus side, you have annoyed me so much that I’ve given up trying to get to sleep for now, and am instead starting this blog. So you’ve managed to annoy me into semi-productivity. Somehow, that makes me even more annoyed!

In summary, please be quiet, leave this street and never come back.

Yours sincerely,

YBG