Open letter to the whiny dog down the road

Dear dog,

Hello. How are you? I know you don’t live in the neighbourhood, because I’ve never heard you around before. I hope you’re having a nice visit. I must respectfully request, however, that you please shut up. It’s almost 2am, and I have to be up for work in a few hours.

While I am normally opposed to unnecessary animal cruelty, if you do not cease and desist from your whining I may become tempted to make an exception to my rule. I do wonder what you are whining about, but no matter what, that doesn’t make your whining acceptable at this time of night in a residential area.

On the plus side, you have annoyed me so much that I’ve given up trying to get to sleep for now, and am instead starting this blog. So you’ve managed to annoy me into semi-productivity. Somehow, that makes me even more annoyed!

In summary, please be quiet, leave this street and never come back.

Yours sincerely,



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